February 06, 2012

Public Service Announcement

Due to unforseen circumstances I was unable to watch the Super Bowl telecast this weekend, your honor. I assure you I made sincere plans to watch (in the company of others who might have served as witnesses should any question arise as to whether or not I'd conscientiously performed my necessary part in the thing again this year). Jury duty, yes your honor, that would be the other one.

Things came up. That's all I can say. No, not an excuse, your honor, no, I agree with you there: not an excuse at all. I did something else, plain and simple. Yes, your honor, I will as the court directs let people know I didn't see the game and bear the full benefit of their post-game insight into what exactly it was that transpired as one who is in no position to contradict anything they might venture to say on the matter for the rest of my natural days.

No comments: